The most powerful person in a room knows how to control their ego and manipulate the egos of others. Now, I don’t mean in the conniving, evil, negative way “manipulating” is used. I mean it in the way a master craftsman handles his tools to create a bespoke armoire or a conductor orchestrates a symphony. Understanding the degree of fragility of another’s ego, or the things of greatest importance to a person allows you to more effectively negotiate difficult situations and even communicate on a regular basis. If someone’s identity is knit with a particular hobby or creation, don’t crap on it. If anything, learn a bit about it, ask questions, be genuinely interested, if not in the topic, then in the chance to learn something new, and be generous and sincere in your praise. The genuineness and sincerity are crucial, never lie. A lie can be more damaging to a person’s ego than a directed cruel word. When you know what makes a person tick, you can phrase your own desires and goals in such a way which will beat in sync with their own. Doing so will garner you not just a helping hand, but someone invested in the things you are doing, because you seemingly understanding them. Unfortunately, there are times when others will not extend the same courtesy to you. Do not take offense. Curb the rage which comes from a slighted ego. Remind yourself everyone is human. Offer forgiveness, even if it’s silent. Take it as an opportunity to learn more about this person; every person’s action reveals something about themselves, take note. In this way, observe the world and people around you without attachment. Once you understand its workings, you can utilize different aspects as tools towards accomplishing magnificent things.
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